REVIEW: Ocean's Twelve

I went to see Ocean’s Twelve last night, and man was it ever busy. The two early-late shows were sold out, so we caught the last screening at 10:45. We got into the lineup 45 minutes before the movie started, and we were at the very end, all the way out to the door. Fortuntely, we were able to get good seats inside. I have been waiting to see this movie ever since it was announced (and apparently so were a lot of other people) and as I really enjoyed Ocean’s Eleven, I had massive expectations going into this one.

And oh how those expectations were not met. Taken on its own, the movie is decent, it’s entertaining and visually appealing. The problem is that it cannot be taken on its own. If you skipped Ocean’s Eleven, you won’t have a clue what’s going on in this movie. Even if you did watch Ocean’s Eleven there are parts in the sequel that just don’t make sense.

Let’s start with the cast. Basically, the entire gang is back plus Catherine Zeta-Jones, who I think wasn’t used correctly. She spends the first three quarters of the movie giving everyone a “knowing smirk”, which makes it difficult to feel sorry for her or happy for her during the last part of the movie. Her part could have been so much better. George Clooney and Brad Pitt gave performances that were expected of them, but nothing spectacular. The only one that really had to do any acting was Matt Damon, and he was good at convincingly playing a moron.

So what about the story? Par for the course. Interesting twist with the competition, but it wasn’t the focal point of the movie. It would have been so much more interesting if it had been. Instead, the entire thing seemed rushed, and the big heist lost its appeal. Ocean’s Eleven did a much better job of making the heist interesting. In this movie, it almost seemed like an afterthought. It was like the writers said to themselves, “Oh, we have to include a heist in here somewhere, it is a sequel.” And an egg? I mean seriously, $160 million dollars is a lot more entertaining than some egg, no matter how much it is worth. Actually there are two heists in the movie, the main one and a smaller initial one that probably got just as much screen time. I daresay the only thing that was stolen in this movie was my time.

The part that really disappointed me was the inclusion of real actors into the story. For example, Topher Grace was looking after Rusty’s (Brad Pitt) apartment. Bruce Willis has some screen time as well, as himself, after he recognized Tess Ocean as Julia Roberts, who is played by Julia Roberts, and who in the movie, has to pretend to be Julia Roberts, because they look alike. Its even dumber in the movie than it sounds in my previous sentence. I ignored all the critics who said the movie was just a party between A-list actors, but including real actors in the story just made me regret ignoring the critics. Bruce Willis, Julia Roberts, and Topher Grace don’t belong in Ocean’s Twelve, and it made the movie seem trashy.

Overall, I was disappointed. I mean, the movie wasn’t bad, and there are some great scenes and even some funny parts, but it could have been so much better. If you’re looking to watch something with a bunch of famous actors, this is your movie. If you’re looking for a good heist movie, watch Ocean’s Eleven or The Italian Job. Let’s hope the sequel to that movie is better than this one.