It was only a matter of time I guess – the “oh my god my parents are on Facebook” articles have started to appear in the MSM. Here is what Michelle Slatalla wrote about her experiences with Facebook in the New York Times a couple weeks ago:
After I got my Profile page, the first thing I did was to search for other members — my daughter and her friends — to ask them to be my friends.
Shockingly, quite a few of them — the friends, not the daughter — accepted my invitation and gave me access to their Profiles, including their interests, hobbies, school affiliations and in some cases, physical whereabouts.
You can read the whole thing if you like, but essentially the story is that Slatalla’s daughter was very unhappy her mom had joined Facebook. A week or so later, Patrick White wrote a similar article for the Globe and Mail. I was interviewed for the piece, but my quotes were not included, probably because my story is pretty boring by comparison – I don’t mind that my parents have Facebook at all! Anyway, here’s a quote from the article:
The site now bridges a chasm once rarely crossed between student life and family life by offering a window into the lives of both children and parents. Family dynamics may never be the same.
Mark Evans and Chris LaBossiere, among others, have also written recently about the older crowd joining Facebook.
I don’t understand what the big deal is. Facebook is just a tool – not a tool for teenagers or a tool for older folks, it’s a tool for everyone. My parents joined Facebook about a month ago and use it daily. They have connected with colleagues and friends, and they both update their status many times a day.
So what if there are pictures of me drinking on Facebook? Who cares if they can read all of my wall posts? Let’s assume they saw something they didn’t approve of – what are they going to do about it? There’s nothing they can do! Besides, I know my parents trust me to make smart decisions and to take responsibility for my own actions – that’s the way I was raised.
If you have a problem with your parents joining Facebook and seeing your profile, I think you need to take a closer look at the relationship you have with them. Having your entire family on Facebook shouldn’t greatly impact the family dynamic, except maybe for the better by creating another avenue for communication (but for communication that should already be taking place).
The only big difference Facebook has made for my family is that we use MSN Messenger slightly less. We don’t have to send the standard “what are you up to” messages because we get each other’s status updates instead.
When my parents joined Facebook, my first thought wasn’t “omg what are they going to see now” it was “damn this is cool my parents are technologically savvy!” At the risk of sounding condescending or mean, I would suggest that if your reaction is the “oh my god” kind then the relationship you have with with your parents probably isn’t as good as it should be (maybe you already know this, maybe you don’t). View them joining Facebook not as a negative thing, but as a way to improve your relationship!
Of course it’s easy for me to say these things, because I have a great relationship with my parents. All I am trying to get across is that whatever problems you think your parents joining Facebook will create likely existed long before Facebook did.
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